Dusty Shelves Revisited, Part 2

My DVD re-watch/discard project (see July 25 blogpost) for thinning out my DVD library continues. This time the thin-out portion of it was more successful. Once again, the plan was to pick a disc randomly from each shelf (out of a total of 16 shelves) with the intention of rating each pick as 1) re-watch and keep, 2) re-watch and discard, or 3) discard at once. Last time I re-watched and kept every one of the picks from the first 8 shelves. The results from shelves 9-16 are below. I modified the plan slightly when my first pick was a “discard at once.” When that happened I picked again from the same shelf until I found one I was willing to re-watch. No shelf required more than two picks. It has not escaped my attention that it was easier to find “discards” among the films made since 1980 than among those of older vintage. That 6 of the 8 re-watches had murder central to the plot is a coincidence; that’s a much higher proportion than in the shelf contents in toto.

Angel (1984). Unapologetic trash. (The movie has no connection whatsoever to the TV series Angel.) A 15-y.o. prep school girl moonlights as a hooker and befriends the oddball street people on Hollywood Blvd. A psycho killer is prowling the streets and killing prostitutes. After the murder of a friend at his hands, Angel grabs her landlady’s gun and goes after the killer herself. I previously had deemed this un-shelfworthy but through sheer neglect didn’t remove it. Though undeniably it has guilty pleasure elements, it’s still a Discard.

**** ****

Psychos in Love (1987): Two psycho-killers find each other in this cult movie filmed for $75,000. Not only do both love to kill but they discover that they both detest grapes. True love ensues. This is definitely not for everyone, but if your silly streak extends far enough into the dark side, you might chuckle at this. A close call, but a Discard.

**** ****

The Doom Generation (1995): In the 90s there was a bumper crop of mainstream ultraviolent films: Goodfellas, Natural Born Killers, Pulp Fiction, and more. Most of them were not just gore-fests but had something to say. I suspect director Gregg Araki found what they had to say pretentious. His very Gen-X film The Doom Generation is simply nihilistic. The meaning of its violence is that it is without meaning. The three main characters (two young men and a young woman) are fazed very little by the brutality they encounter. As for their personal affections, none takes sex seriously enough to demonstrate a twinge of jealousy in their intimate bisexual triangle. Their lives are hell – whenever they buy something the price is $6.66 – but they don’t seem to care. Johnathon Schaech (Xavier Red) and James Duval (Jordan White) play their roles well enough but Rose McGowan (Amy Blue) steals every scene. (Yes, the nominal color scheme is a bit heavy-handed.) I’d recommend this movie only to those with a particular kind of off-beat world view and a tolerance for graphic cinematic violence. Another close call, but Keep.

**** ****

House of 1000 Corpses (2003): Discard at once without rewatch. This Rob Zombie film is not bad for its type, but I don’t care much for its type.

**** ****

He Was a Quiet Man (2007): The title comes from the comments we hear all too often from neighbors and co-workers about some multiple murderer. You know them: “He was a quiet man…Very polite… He seemed so nice… He always said ‘good morning’ to me... He was a loner.” Bob Maconel (Christian Slater) is an office worker with a dreary job and horrible co-workers. He is schizophrenic and has two-way conversations with his goldfish. Day after day he loads and unloads his gun at his cubicle, trying to work up the temerity to kill all his co-workers except for one named Venessa who has a nice smile. On a day full of particularly degrading treatment, he seems ready finally to do it, but he drops a bullet while loading his gun. As he reaches down for it, shots ring out and bodies drop to the floor: another worker has gone postal first. Venessa is among the victims but is still alive. Bob kills the shooter before he can finish off Venessa. Instead of being a villain as he intended, Bob is a hero due purely to timing and butterfingers. He visits Venessa in the hospital and finds that she has been left quadriplegic. She asks him to end her life. Bob has to decide how to handle her request. This is not a bad movie, but I don’t think I’ll ever want to watch it again. So, Discard.

**** ****

Forgetting Sarah Marshall (2008): There is a type of raunchy broad comedy that doesn’t really appeal to me. The reason has nothing to do with high standards, which I don’t profess to have. I object neither to graphic sex nor low humor in film or anywhere else. There is just a peculiar blend of the two that leaves me waiting impatiently for a scene to end while much of the audience around me guffaws loudly: for example, the scene in Forgetting Sarah Marshall in which couples in neighboring hotel rooms try to outdo each other in noisy sex in order to make each other jealous. I’m not in the least offended by it. It just doesn’t make me laugh.

Sarah Marshall (Kristen Bell) is a TV sitcom star who dumps her boyfriend Peter (Jason Segel), the music composer for the TV show. The depressed Peter tries to get over Sarah with a series of one-night stands. These don’t help, so he vacations in Hawaii to clear his head. In a coincidence of the kind that happens in movies and nowhere else, Sarah books into the same hotel with her new boyfriend, pop singer Aldous Snow (Russell Brand). The hotel clerk Rachel (Mila Kunis) feels sorry for Peter and tries to help.

By the standards of its genre the movie is pretty good even though Peter is not nearly as sympathetic a character as he is intended to be. It’s just not my kind of movie. Discard.

**** ****

Killers (2010) with Ashton Kutcher and Katherine Heigl. Discard at once without rewatch. Uninteresting and unexciting spy/comedy movie.

**** ****

Home Sweet Hell (2015): This is another Katherine Heigl vehicle. I like Heigl as an actress, but her films since 2000 (even though a few were commercially successful) have ranged from mediocre to dreadful. Home Sweet Hell is mediocre. In this self-styled comedy Mona (Heigl) has specific goals that she pastes in a scrapbook. She schedules everything including sex (six times per year) with her husband Don. Don cheats with a young woman named Dusty (Jordana Brewster) who then blackmails him. Don decides the least bad option is to come clean with Mona. Mona coolly decides to kill Dusty so she and Don can stay on track toward her goals. Are you feeling the humor yet? Me neither. Discard.

**** ****

Nerve (2016): Discard at once without rewatch. It’s about a hardcore online version of Truth or Dare. OK, but not worth a re-watch.

**** ****

How to Be Single (2016) Some *Spoilers* follow. There are several overlapping plots, but the central story is that of Alice (Dakota Johnson) who feels she never has experienced being truly single. She always has been in some relationship. So, she tells her boyfriend Josh they should take a break from each other. That way, if they do end up back together, they won’t blame each other for having missed out on life. Alice moves to Manhattan where her sister Meg is a single-by-choice OB/GYN. Alice meets Robin (Rebel Wilson) at the law firm where she gets a job as a paralegal. It doesn’t take much freewheeling casual sex for Alice to decide the experiment is over; she contacts Josh to resume their relationship but discovers he has moved on and plans to marry someone else. There are side plots with other young women. Tying the plots together is Tom the bartender who offers string-free sex and bartender-style philosophy. Alice’s epiphany (the reason for the spoiler alert) comes when she realizes that she has not been learning how to be single because she has kept trying to become part of a couple. The final scene has Alice watching and savoring the sunrise alone in the Grand Canyon, something one can do at a whim when single, but far less spontaneously when not. Being truly single can be a pretty cool thing at any time, but especially in one’s 20s. Close call, but Keep.

**** ****

Ouija: Origin of Evil (2016) Discard at once without rewatch. Snooze.

**** ****

Ingrid Goes West (2017) The smartphone co-stars in the film with Aubrey Plaza. Ingrid (Aubrey) is a mentally troubled young woman with a horrible self-image and difficulties making real friendships. Retreating to her phone, she becomes a follower of Instagram star Taylor Sloan (Elizabeth Olsen) who posts about her fabulous California lifestyle of sun, fun, fashion, and joy. When Ingrid inherits money from her mom, she uses it to move west and become part of Taylor’s life, which she does by secretly stealing her dog and then returning the “found” animal. Ingrid values her own life entirely by the likes and shares on her own Instagram account and by her inclusion in Taylor’s social media. The consequences are bleak and credible. A timely movie: Keep.

**** ****

Well, that’s a better result than last time: 9 discards. The project started to seem like work rather than whimsy however. I’ll take a breather before considering starting at the top shelf again for a Dusty Shelves Revisited, Part 3.

Cake - End of the Movie