Identifying Garbage

The purpose of most clickbait on social media sites is to expose the clicker to additional ads. We all know this, but we sometimes take the bait anyway. Nowadays AIs creepily choose bait specifically tailored for each user based on his or her online activities. Mention on Facebook that you are looking for a new car and auto ads will appear. Recently I’ve mentioned dumpsters online. It is perhaps no surprise that a link appeared to an article in A Lot Finance titled 50 Things Retirees Should Throw Out. The AIs also obviously know my age. I clicked. I’m a fan of uncluttering, so I was willing to wade through additional ads to see if there was any genuinely useful advice. These were the 50.

Dumpster by my barn last year

1.    Your Home. Um, I don’t think so. The time may come when selling my home and downsizing is necessary for financial reasons. We do what we have to do. But as long as I can pay the bills on it I’ll keep it. It was built by my dad. It is home.
2.    Your Children’s Old Stuff. I don’t have kids, so there is nothing to throw out. My parents’ old stuff is a bigger issue.
3.    Business Clothes. As a real estate broker my attire was semi-formal at the best of times. There are still uses for a tie and blazer or sport jacket, so I’ll keep them for now. My clothes closets don’t overflow anyway.
4.    Collectibles. If this means coins, stamps, butterflies, 19^th century clocks, or other such hobby-like collections, I don’t collect sets of anything. I have random individual artifacts, each with some family history attached, but they are not collections.
5.    Exercise Equipment. I never have bought exercise equipment.
6.    Fine China. I don’t have any. My good plates look a little nicer than my everyday microwavable plates but are by no means special or valuable. I don’t cringe when one breaks.
7.    Storage Unit. I have no storage unit to empty. I do have a barn and have done pretty well at cleaning out my excess stuff from it since 2020. However, the space was then filled by the stuff of friends and family who due to special circumstances have needed a “temporary” place to put it all. I am not free to throw that out.
8.    Old Spices. I do need to keep a better eye on expiration dates, though this is not a major space issue.
9.    Cars. The article suggests I no longer need two of them. True, I don’t need two, but I like having them because they serve different purposes. I have a very basic Chevy pickup for hauling lumber, gravel, brush, and whatnot. I have a Trailblazer (a smallish SUV) for…well…a car. The latter also has All Wheel Drive (the truck does not), which makes it a good winter vehicle. Besides, I suspect if one of my garage bays went empty it would be filled in a week by more of my friends’ stuff. Temporarily.
10. Old Linens. I don’t have a closet full of these. Do people keep more than two per bed – one spare for when the other is in the wash?
11. Kitchen Equipment. I presume this means portable equipment such as blenders and fryers rather than the built-ins. I don’t have these. (I’m a single male for whom cooking is not a hobby.) I do have a coffee maker but I’m not getting rid of that.
12. Dirty Old Shoes. I don’t let these pile up anyway. I do have some nice shoes that I seldom wear because I don’t dress up much anymore, but for the occasions when I do I’d better keep those.
13. Sentimental Items. OK I have some of these but I keep them because they are…um…sentimental.
14. Expired Makeup. Not an issue.
15. Home Décor. Wouldn’t ridding the existing décor just mean getting new? I don’t see the decluttering advantage.
16. Antiques You Don’t Care About. I wouldn’t still have them if I didn’t care about them. However, if I ever downsize as urged in point #1 I can cut them loose then. I don’t collect antiques for their own sake. Each has a family history of some kind, so they probably should be meted out to cousins (the closest blood relations I have remaining) if and when I need to get rid of them.
17. Old Computers. Because of the special disposal rules for electronics, these do tend to accumulate in basements and closets until “later.” As it happens, though, I’ve caught up on ridding myself of these.
18. Bulk Items. That is pretty vague. The article clarifies, “However, most people find in retirement, there’s no need for all those groceries!” Given the exclamation point, the prospect seems pretty exciting to the author. Once again: single male for whom cooking is not a hobby. Except for Thanksgiving and the occasional cookout, I never bought groceries in bulk anyway.
19. Extra Furniture. I wouldn’t call any of my current furniture extra. I’ve already gotten rid of the excess – from my old office for example.
20. Phone Books. Not a problem. I’m aware of the internet and have been for quite a little while. I have a prodigy email for goodness sake. (Prodigy predated AOL.)
21. Old Files. I do dispose of most files more than seven years old.
22. Anything That Is Too High Maintenance. Again, pretty vague. This begs a dating joke but I won’t make it.
23. Jewelry. Not really my thing.
24. Missing Pairs. Well, yeah. Why would I keep an unmatched shoe?
25. Holiday Décor. I never tried to outdo the neighbors with holiday decorations so I merely have two modest boxes with lights and bulbs for the tree. I’ll use them again so I’ll keep them.
26. Books. Them’s fightin’ words.
27. Expired Medications. Not an issue.
28. Luggage. “You probably don't need a 10-piece luggage set.” Maybe not. I actually hadn’t considered that.
29. Knick Knacks. Like the artifacts and antiques mentioned above (in fact they are the same items), I keep only the ones with sentimental family history.
30. Old Phones. Do people keep old phones?
31. Sports Equipment. Don’t really have that.
32. Musical Instrument. “But let's be honest--that guitar hasn't been out of its case in years.” The only instrument in the house is a piano. I don’t play it (my mom did) but for weight reasons alone it is staying where it is.
33. Outdoor Equipment. I live on 5 acres. Admittedly 4 are woods, but nonetheless I’m keeping my lawn equipment.
34. DVDs and CDs. “If you're no longer using them, why not get rid of them?” I’m using them.
35. Power Tools. Don’t touch my tools!
36. Magazines. I don’t save back issues of anything.
37. Board Games. The board games in my house don’t belong to me. See #7.
38. Film Projector. There is one of those stored in the crawlspace. Perhaps I should project the 8mm reels in the box next to it before disposing of it though. They are probably just home movies of myself and sis as kids on a Florida beach, but you never know.
39. Musty Towels. I replace these as needed anyway.
40. That Old Camera Recorder. I don’t own one of those old VHS models.
41. Old VHS Tapes. I don’t store these.
42. Everything in That Junk Drawer. Everything in that junk drawer is there for a reason: paper clips, spare keys, carpet tacks, notepads, magic markers, etc.
43. Servingware. OK, I rarely use the big serving platters, but I do use them on Thanksgiving and other occasions.
44. Anything That’s Not Yours. See #7.
45. Miscellaneous Cords and Chargers. I’m pretty good at disposing of the ones that don’t fit my current equipment.
46. Office Supplies. I still find use for files, envelopes, reams of paper, et al. left over from business days. They’ll whittle down simply from regular attrition.
47. Fake Plants. I do have some of these. (They were mom’s.) They are the only plants I can keep green, but I suppose they could vanish from the house without causing any angst.
48. Lunch Boxes. I don’t own a lunch box.
49. Keepsakes You Don’t Care About Anymore. Well, they wouldn’t be keepsakes then, would they?
50. Bulky Old TV Sets. Already long gone.

So from all that came the mildly useful suggestions to dispose of fake plants, old luggage, and maybe a movie projector. Well, that is something I suppose, but not enough volume to justify ordering another dumpster. If a link shows up with the bait 50 More Things Retirees Should Throw Out, I think I’ll leave it unclicked.

 

The Cramps – Garbageman