Due to
you-know-what there hasn’t been a significant get-together at my house in a
year. Prior to then there was at least one sizable party per season, usually holiday
related: solstices and equinoxes count as holidays. My parties aren’t boozy by normal measures, but they aren’t entirely dry either. My own consumption of alcohol
has varied over the years from a bit excessive in my 20s, to near teetotal avoidance
in my 30s, to light-side-of-moderate today. The last descriptor might seem
subjective, but I’m using the CDC’s guidance to define moderate. According to
the CDC, an adult male should restrict his alcohol consumption to no more than
14 drinks per week and no more than 4 in any one day. (A standard drink in the
US is 14 grams of pure alcohol, which is equivalent to 1.5 ounce [44.4 mL] of
40% [80 proof] spirits.) I haven’t had 4 drinks in a single day in years. I haven’t
neared (much less exceeded) the weekly limit in decades. In consequence of such
restrained sippage by either guests or myself, the inside of my liquor cabinet
hasn’t seen much daylight (or artificial light) since the early days of 2020.
So, earlier today I figured it was time to sort through what was there and
spill out what needed spilling.
My liquor cabinet
2019 equinox party
Unless
stored recklessly, unopened spirits and wines have a shelf life longer than a
human lifetime. Once opened, however, even hard liquors go bad in months. How
many months depends on how much air is in the bottle. A mostly empty bottle
should probably be discarded after 3; a mostly full one is good for 6 months to
a year. They don’t go bad in the sense of being dangerous (more than
otherwise, that is) but in the sense that they taste awful (more than
otherwise, that is). Several partially filled bottles were selected out of my
cabinet to intoxicate whatever critters (microscopic or otherwise) live in the
drain pipes. There
is no cabinet or drawer in my house for other intoxicating substances unless you
count caffeine. Despite having lived in a college dorm in the hippie era with constant
haze in the hallways and a dealer in psychedelics on every floor, I never cared
for any of them. I have been in favor since my teens of legalization of all
recreational drugs (not just marijuana) but that always has been on civil libertarian
grounds rather than because I have a taste for them. There are other arguments
in favor of legalization (the social side effects of the drug war) too, but I
trot them out only when debating someone who values social arguments more. For me, though,
the belief that free people have the right to make bad choices for themselves
is enough by itself. It’s a belief not always widely shared. 120 years ago,
true enough, you could buy cocaine and morphine over the counter, but all that
changed in the next two decades. 101 years ago alcohol Prohibition began. The current
contents of my liquor cabinet, though fairly modest, would have been enough to
earn me a prison sentence. Prohibition ended in 1933. Prohibition
was enacted by Constitutional Amendment, by the way, because the federal courts
(though not state courts) back then did share the quaint idea that the Bill of
Rights protected a citizen’s right to make bad decisions. An Amendment got around the real possibility that the
Supreme Court might otherwise overthrow a federal ban on alcohol sales. The
same concerns account for the bizarre way marijuana was banned by the Marijuana
Stamp Tax Act of 1937. Marijuana was not outlawed per se; you simply had to pay a tax on it by buying a stamp.
However, you had to bring in the substance to be stamped, and since the
marijuana was unstamped when you brought it in you were in violation of the law.
This Catch-22 arrangement persisted until 1970 when it was replaced by the Controlled
Substances Act. By 1970 there was less concern the Court would overthrow straightforwardly
paternalistic legislation. The concern has only lessened since then. Anyway,
the cabinet doors are closed again. Perhaps by the solstice I’ll be able to
open them again for actual company. Though NJ is stumbling through an obstacle
course of the legislature’s own making toward legalization of pot, any guests
inclined toward it will have to supply themselves. Nonetheless, perhaps someday
(though I don’t see it happening soon) we’ll even revive the general notion
that what private people voluntarily do in private settings is nobody else’s
business.
Bessie Smith – Tain't
Nobody Business If I Do (1923)
I never knew liquor went bad, or maybe it never occurred to me. I never noticed any change in taste either. But I've never kept them around that long either. But did buy liter of whiskey off a friend that had gotten off the job somewhere in a damaged shipment that I remember lasting for a long time, but I never threw it out or emptied it, except into my stomach. I do prefer liquor to beer however. Beer always seems to disrupt my sleep cycle, which I guess has to do with body chemistry or something.
I saw the other day that they are legislating the okay to grow cannabis here, but not consume it yet, medically or otherwise. I don't expect anything from that soon either. Though I think eventually it will happen all over.
The issue is oxidation, of course. Capping a bottle – even a mostly empty one – will help a lot, but otherwise whiskey might last only days rather than months. Leave out a single pour in an open glass on the countertop: the color will get noticeably murkier in 24 hours, the flavor will flatten, and the proof will lessen. It’s not generally dangerous (the alcohol content is still high enough to keep it pretty safe) but it’s not much like what comes out of a newly opened bottle. I prefer whiskey to beer, too. I never was much of a fan of beer – except nonalcoholic birch beer and root beer. Most common tipple of straight spirits: Wild Turkey 101, a high-rye mid-shelf bourbon. There are better bourbons but nearly all of them are much pricier and I’m not enough of a connoisseur to pay the premium. At under $30 for 750ml it’s a good value for the flavor. It’s a matter of taste, of course. Some prefer wheated bourbons such as Maker’s Mark.
Some of the drug laws (and how they are enforced) are surprisingly iffy. Opium, for example: people grow poppies decoratively and there is a poppy seed cake in my kitchen at this very moment. Yet, if you grow a whole garden of them I suspect you would get a visit from the DEA.
I never knew liquor went bad, or maybe it never occurred to me. I never noticed any change in taste either. But I've never kept them around that long either. But did buy liter of whiskey off a friend that had gotten off the job somewhere in a damaged shipment that I remember lasting for a long time, but I never threw it out or emptied it, except into my stomach. I do prefer liquor to beer however. Beer always seems to disrupt my sleep cycle, which I guess has to do with body chemistry or something.
ReplyDeleteI saw the other day that they are legislating the okay to grow cannabis here, but not consume it yet, medically or otherwise. I don't expect anything from that soon either. Though I think eventually it will happen all over.
The issue is oxidation, of course. Capping a bottle – even a mostly empty one – will help a lot, but otherwise whiskey might last only days rather than months. Leave out a single pour in an open glass on the countertop: the color will get noticeably murkier in 24 hours, the flavor will flatten, and the proof will lessen. It’s not generally dangerous (the alcohol content is still high enough to keep it pretty safe) but it’s not much like what comes out of a newly opened bottle. I prefer whiskey to beer, too. I never was much of a fan of beer – except nonalcoholic birch beer and root beer. Most common tipple of straight spirits: Wild Turkey 101, a high-rye mid-shelf bourbon. There are better bourbons but nearly all of them are much pricier and I’m not enough of a connoisseur to pay the premium. At under $30 for 750ml it’s a good value for the flavor. It’s a matter of taste, of course. Some prefer wheated bourbons such as Maker’s Mark.
DeleteSome of the drug laws (and how they are enforced) are surprisingly iffy. Opium, for example: people grow poppies decoratively and there is a poppy seed cake in my kitchen at this very moment. Yet, if you grow a whole garden of them I suspect you would get a visit from the DEA.